Here’s Why You Need a Trauma-Informed Self-Care Routine
Wellness is more than just skin deep. After the summer of 2020, Black History Month is shining a light on how there’s a lot more to consider when it comes to "self-care" for a melanated person. As frequently recommended in the ACP archives, I decided to take my own advice and alter my self-care routine to protect my peace during Black History Month.
I recently picked up the Morgan Harper Nichols playing cards made in collaboration with Darling Media. It was a fun activity I’ve been wanting to do for and with myself for a while now, considering that I wanted to deviate from my normal stream-of-consciousness journaling practice. It was a lighthearted way to introduce play into my routine, and those tiny pieces of witty art have quickly become a new favorite.
Once I was feeling self-actualized and grateful for my journey, I thought to follow up the activity with a movie. I typically opt for a sci-fi or action comedy movie to unwind. However, when I logged on to browse new releases, the list of historical black movies was endless. They were movies that aren’t otherwise available throughout the year. Movies that, for the most part, are actaully black trauma porn. Although some pieces intrigued me, I made the conscious decision to avoid these life-like depictions of preferential abuse and social negligence. As someone who has lived that reality in depth, unironically and casually choosing to view these stories of struggle for “entertainment” just didn’t jive well with my spirit.
The dreadful scroll through memoirs and recollections of perseverance got me questioning why any black person would watch these movies. Were they even made for us? If not, are those who need to watch them watching them at all? Who thinks we’re snuggling up with a bowl of popcorn to snicker and gawk at our collective agony? If made for us, why would we as a people consume something that would more than likely re-traumatize us? Even if a historical piece, why aren’t there content warnings for us?
The media may let those with trauma down, but there are ways we can care for ourselves. As I did in that moment, we can choose to engage with something other than trauma and the exploitation of trauma—thank you, Don’t Look Up! We can engage in a powerful rendition of self-care, so here are a few reasons why you may want to adjust your self-care routine to consider your traumas:
To Avoid Re-Traumatization
Trauma-informed (self) care is a trauma-informed approach to care realizes trauma and how it can affect people and groups, recognizing the signs of trauma, having a system which can respond to trauma, and resisting re-traumatization. It’s not about feeling shameful about the feelings or concerns that come up for you. It’s about dealing with them in healthy ways that better aid with your recovery, care, and response. Where self-care is about empowering one’s sense of self through healthy and restorative habits, trauma-informed self-care is about preserving your overall well-being by being mindful of your injuries and taking a treatment-focused, safety-first approach.
For example, I usually stay away from any piece of media, content, or art with racial themes and undertones during Black History Month. I specifically avoid films attempting to reflect the edgelord humor of years past, but are really just trauma porn hiding in plain sight. Following along with the practice, I was aware of my triggers in that moment and where they stemmed from. I was aware of how I would be triggered—i.e., the movies’ talking points and plots that that would’ve ignited those triggers—and made a plan to avoid both my triggers and the domino effect of their onset.
Setting boundaries with the content (or anything else) you consume is another way you can observe trauma-informed self-care. It’s a practice called conscious consumption, and as in my case, it can help you gauge what your capacity and emotional bandwidth are. It focuses more on the quality and impact of what you take in. Applied in conjunction with trauma-informed care, it can formulate a dynamic and almost bullet-proof self-care routine. A person can quickly check in with their inner guide to analyze their habits, environment, stimulus, and state of being to choose better for themselves when observing both practices as mutually inclusive. A regular ritual can lead to heightened situational awareness, self-awareness, emotional safety and regulation, incredible self-advocacy, as well as actionable discernment and self-nurturance that doesn’t require additional or inflammatory wounds.
To Build Better Self-Trust
There’s no pressure to care for yourself in the ‘right’ way, if you’re following the lifelong guide that is your intuition. Trauma-informed self-care is all about connecting with your intuition, as well as your healthcare providers. You have to be honest with yourself and where you find yourself—i.e., physically, emotionally, mentally, etc.
If you have trouble with food or were ridiculed at an early age about your eating habits, an act of trauma-informed care (as far as media goes) may look like you following that inner voice telling you to skip that date with your favorite weekly television show. Why? Because it might garner a negative response in relation to food or send you into an unexpected shame spiral. Once you find another activity that better suits your needs, you may want to follow up with your therapist to tell them why you felt as though you would be triggered watching that show. You would’ve not only avoided re-traumatization in that moment, but you would’ve also effectively communicated to inner child, “I’m here. I care. I’m listening. I love you, and I’m protecting you.”
That’s just one example of how the remnants of trauma can sneak up on you. You could be going about life without a single care in the world, of the belief that everything’s “fine” or all that “bad stuff” is behind you. Heart and mind healed, however, your body stores and remembers it all. Tuning into your gut—your body—in those moments can give you clues about your psyche, or how your wounds maybe impacting you or your life on a subconscious level. It may be the thing that gets you to open up and ask for help, or seek a more rigorous care plan with the help of professionals.
Although it can be practiced as a monthly or weekly ritual, self-care is a daily activity. We do it without noticing, and as you would exercise a muscle, practicing it in response to your traumas (or lived experiences) can morph into a daily habit too.
To Fully Embrace Your Humanity
Understanding your wounds, and how to treat them according to your needs, lends room for more honest care and expression. Sink further into relaxation knowing the world isn’t over if you respond to a trigger instinctively, rather than logically or in a healthy manner. At the end of the day, you’re still human; to err is to be human.
As humans, we have a wide range of emotions and express them in a variety of ways. We more often than not have been wounded in a variety of ways, too. When you engage in trauma-informed self-care, you are allowing yourself to open up to all the ways you could be a kind and loving self-parent or nurturer. You give yourself the grace to understand where your wounds stem from, how to better prepare or react, and how to effectively set boundaries with yourself, others, your diet, habits, devices, and social media.
After all, self-care practices are lessons of self-love put into action. So keep learning how to explore your inner-most layers and how to keep evolving as a well-balanced human.